Steps of Discernment
1. Develop a Personal Prayer Life
Anyone interested in priesthood or religious life must begin the discernment journey by developing a more structured and regular personal prayer life. A prayer aid, such as Give us This Day or a prayer breviary, provides a basic framework of psalms, readings, and intercessions that serve as a starting point for personal prayer. These afford variety and structure, as well as room for your own words.
Moreover, it is one thing to express our deep desires to God in prayer, but we also need to develop the skill of silence—to listen. We first need to quiet external sources of noise (cell phones, computers, and other devices) and internal noise (plans, ambitions, and other worries) so we can listen to God.
2. Celebrate Eucharist and Reconciliation
Participating in Mass every Sunday and on Holy Days of Obligation is a necessary commitment/practice in your discernment journey. As you grow in your spirituality, participate in daily Mass as you are able, taking time to prayerfully read and reflect on the Scripture readings for the day’s Mass. Christ speaks to us through the words of Scripture, through the sacraments we receive, and through the members of the Body of Christ.
The sacrament of reconciliation is a simple and effective way to examine one’s conscience and life routinely. By confessing one’s sins honestly to a priest, you are aware of your failures, but more importantly, you are becoming more trusting in God’s unconditional mercy. Saint Benedict urges us to “never despair of God’s mercy.” RB 4:74
3. Find a Spiritual Director
Listening to the voice of the Holy Spirit happens best with the help of a seasoned priest, religious, or well-trained layperson who has lived the Christian life long enough to know the pitfalls and the graces of these vocations. Such a person is able to listen carefully to you as you describe the shape of your desires. They will field your questions, guide you in identifying which are most important, and pose questions to nudge you to go deeper.
For this conversation to work, you need a high level of trust and comfort to be vulnerable and honest with this individual.
4. Contact the Vocation Director
You can expect the Abbey Vocation Director to pose questions that you have never thought of – these may startle you, but they will draw you into a deeper understanding of who you are and what the Holy Spirit is asking of you. Monastic life is not a theoretical vocation; it is a lived experience.
It is important to reflect upon and then explore what it means to live one’s life in this particular community. Questions will tumble through your mind as you learn about the life of a monk; what it means to pray and live together on a daily basis, as well as the genuine struggles of monastic life, both individual and communal.
5. Visit Monastic Communities
A visit to a monastic community is often a powerful, transformative experience in this sense: at least one hundred questions are immediately answered, and they are replaced by one hundred more. The primary purpose of your visit and the exploration you are undertaking is to gain greater clarity on the question: Is this a good idea for me? Is this God’s calling for me?
The monastic community and the Vocation Director will help you come to a clearer understanding of yourself and the call of the Holy Spirit. There is no hidden commitment or obligation when you come for a visit. You will find the community to be welcoming and go out of their way to make your visit as fruitful as possible.
